How to Get Real Friends

Everybody wants friendship. God even said that it’s not good for man to be alone, but not all of us have friendship and community, and that’s a problem, because not only do we want friendship and community, but we’re made for it, therefore we ask ourselves “What are the things we need in order to have real community and friendships?” You need at least availability and vulnerability in order to acquire these, but in order to acquire these, you must have carefree timelessness. Having carefree timelessness means you’ve made yourself available, and because of this, you should be open to friendships and making time for other people. Of course, this doesn’t mean you need to do this for EVERYBODY in your life, you CAN’T, because none of us are omnipresent like God, but we CAN make ourselves available to the people we’re closest to such as family and friends that we already have. There is also a difference between transparency and vulnerability. Transparency is like being in a fishbowl and from the outside, you can see everything, but vulnerability is where you let people into the fishbowl and can move some things around a little bit. However, vulnerability is risky because you can move one another’s stuff around, which means that they can hurt you and you can hurt them. This is why trust must be earned, but once it IS earned, being in the deep work of being vulnerable is highly important. This is why carefree timelessness leads to shared experiences, because it cultivates community and friendship, and when it does, you allow your friendship to grow alongside of your community, therefore having REAL friendship and community.

Print Friendly, PDF & Email